How To Be And Find Good Neighbours

Neighbours
So the neighbours don’t talk to you? In Holland apparently when you move in you are expected to invite all your neighbours to a housewarming party to introduce yourself. (If you don’t, it’s considered you are unfriendly and nobody talks to you.)

That’s an obvious thing to do, once you think about it. My parents did this when they moved into a close of only six houses. They had a housewarming and invited all the neighbours.

They knew that for the next twenty years they would be seeing those people going in and out of doorways and driveways. So much better to have somebody you can smile at, wave to, rush over to chat to, call to and invite in for coffee.

As well as chatting about the traffic problem, the awful murder, the wonderful new shops, the park you’ve discovered, the new leisure centre, the bargain in the supermarket, and where to find a cleaner or window cleaner, or curtains to fit the funny shaped windows and where is the water pipe hidden and can you lend me some pruning sheers, give my car a jump start or lend me some sugar.

Some people are natural nurturers. If your neighbour is a good friend, you tend to want to help them, too, because you very quickly find you are indebted to them and are desperately trying to repay all the coffees and meals, and advice and loans.

You can trust them with your keys. And they’ll phone you if they see anything suspicious.

Avoiding domino effect injuries

First a friend cancelled a meeting telling me his mother was unwell, then that he had a sports injury.

I first wondered

1 Was he making a polite excuse. I dismissed that. I think he is more direct. Certainly not shy in emails. And a girlfriend has also cancelled not knowing anything about anybody else's problems. A whole week of stresses.

Could it be the weather or the international situation? Am I seeking links when none is there? Some accidents happen independently. By chance a few fall into clusters.

However, I think we can see occasions when one illness or accident leads to another.

2 One stress has made him prone to another. Domino effect.

I've noticed that illness and accidents in families and friends seems to run around.

Two common accidents:

1 An elderly person is ill. Pills are not locked in cupboard but on kitchen table or bedside. Then their grandchild is hospitalised because of eating pills.

2 A car breaks down on the motorway. The driver, passenger, or person helping is struck by another vehicle.

This might be because other drivers don't realise the stranded car is stationery and hit it.

Or that the person injured is concentrating on the real problem, the breakdown, not on potential problems of other accidents.

So why are we accident prone? Stress? Doing too much? Rushing too fast? Lack of sleep? Anxiety about another problem causing a second due to lack of due care and attention?

I'm the ENFP type on the personality typing analysis, which is why I don't like driving. (I drove to Cornwall with a friend. But since then having had a traffic accident I avoid driving as much as possible.) I'm a typical academic. My mind is on the past and future, not on the present. I reckon you are a more practical type.

A friend of mine is injured. I get a minor injury.

Long ago my baby was underweight. My father carried upstairs a heavy weighing machine sent by NHS. My father was hospitalised with back trouble. My mother-in-law ended up in the same hospital with another problem.

I seem to have 'come out in sympathy' with a friend like husbands who get false pregnancies and aches and pains when their partners are pregnant. He was injured. I rushed about anxiously, not looking where I was going. I got injured.

So when others are ill or injured, take extra care of the health of yourself and the rest of your family. You think thing can't get any worse? They can. It just teaches you that the first problem was not the worst or only thing which could happen to you.

Take care.

Cover Art Needed

My design for the cover of the book of Family History for my mother in law Pearl had to be done quickly. So I took one of the standard designs offered.

I sent them feedback telling them what I needed.

I need a better choice of cover pictures includinga) Cartoons b) All professions c) Memoir or family history pictures d) Better colours e) Load a photo to fit a frame - you convert it to PDF / pixels whatever. :lol:

1 Cartoons needed. I went looking for a picture for my book of comic poetry. Nothing amusing available. Not a single cartoon.If I look in Clipart in Word I find dozens of cartoons.Please include cartoons. :P

2 All Professions neededIf I look in Vistaprint's business card pictures I can see half a dozen for every profession. So writing a book for eg lawyers or primary school children, I would like to be able to use different images on half a dozen books.

(I also need a choice of images to be sure my book of recipes does not have the same cover as every other cookery book by other writers.)

In addition to Vistaprint, look at the selection of designs offered by sticky address label printers such as Ablelabel. You can order Initial letters, signs of zodiac, religious symbols, animals, every profession - dozens of designs.

All ages needed, too, from babies to the elderly. And all nationalities, from flags to city symbols.
Alternatively give some links to clipart sites which offer pictures free or very cheaply, under 5 dollars. If I'm doing books for 10 members of my family, even 5 dollars for a picture for each book would be a lot of money. And 25 dollars would be a lot if I only want one picture and can't be sure the set includes anything suitable. But a free site, or a very cheap price for a dozen pictures would be great. :lol:

3 I would like to write memoirs or family history book for numerous members of my extended family.

Each one needs a different pictures. It needs to be bright and jolly.

I don't want those dismal pictures in brown and grey with skulls which suggest I am waiting for granny to die whilst standing in the mud by her grave. :shock:

I looked at the tropical picture - only one of a palm tree - and it's a sunset - telling my 90 year old granny that she's at the end of her life and it's about to set! :shock:

I picked a bridge. Somebody said that's a symbol of passing on to the next life. :shock: How about a 'family tree' picture for all of us genealogists.

4 Photo frame to fill

Finally, I suggest being able to upload for the front cover a photo to fit in a frame - square, oblong or portrait. Or round or oval or heart. Just square would do. 8) You do the conversion of pixels, PDF whatever. :idea:

I know I should be able to do it in a photoshop program. But hundreds of people can't do this. :cry:

If it's that easy that I should be able to do it, you must be able to set it up so that we can send a photo of the author or subject of the book to you to stick in a frame on the front cover.

Even if you chopped my photo off at waist level and turned it into sepia it would be better than nothing. :P

I just wanted granny's latest photo, or her wedding photo, on the front cover. If you can arrange this, I'll do it for her next birthday. She would be thrilled. :wink:

Creating A Family History Book For A Birthday Gift

For my mother-in-law's 91st birthday I created a book about the history of her life, so far.

I sent the text up to Lulu.com on line Monday evening. Eight days later it arrived through my letterbox. Five working days.

A day after the birthday - I'd hoped it would be quicker. Previously I'd sent a text off on Saturday night and received the finished book by Thursday. Four working days.

The minimum size of a book is 68 pages. That's 68 sides plus cover. 34 bound sheets. It's still a very slim booklet. I had only about 10,000 words of text. So I divided it into about 40 subjects and put each one on a new page. Some sections ran over a couple of pages. I opened with a pieces on our family surnames and ancestors. Some sections ran over two or more pages. I added a few extra pages: Title page, Contents; lists of photos, contacts, list of favourite resaurants.

Pearl was absolutely amazed by the book. It's quite surprising and impressive to write your own memoirs, to see them in print, even with the help of a ghost writer. When you have it done for you, and you are not world famous, it is even more impressive. She was amazed at the amount of information I put in the book.

We take her out to dinner every weekend. I'd been asking her about different members of her family every mealtime. I would write notes in my diary under the table or dash off to the toilet and write it on a scrap of paper, then type it up when I got home.

Some of was originally written into a Family History book I bought from the hospital trolley in the maternity ward when my son was born. I've been updating it ever since. I wish I'd written more.

I sent the text only version off to the printers in a hurry to have it ready for the birthday. Later I added the photos.

I am now waiting for the illustrated version to arrive. It was despatched by Lulu.com, according to the email they sent me at lunchtime today. I had only two copies printed.

After she has read her text version and given me feedback, I shall be able to update it for an even better version.

I now want to do more. My late parents. Myself. My son.

Then I shall be able to offer it as a service to other people.

Making websites user-friendly

Speaking of usability, you often get to the end of a page on a site and don't know how to move on. For example, on many sites, you go to top left and click on home.

Yes, of course I know that. But I didn't for the first week or so. Every site must have newcomers to that site and newcomers to the internet.

And contacting the site managers should be easy. You are there to give them free feedback, when market research would cost them thousands of pounds. At least they should have a feedback site with an automatic message saying, 'Thanks for your feedback. We haven't the resources to reply to every message but we do read them all.'

One publishing site, lulu.com, uses volunteers to man a help service. You are limited to two queries in 24 hours to give everybody a chance of asking a couple of questions.

Most times when I explain my problem and what I've tried so far, I suddenly see the answer by process of elimination. But it's having them there which makes me feel confident and keeps me with them trying to solve the problem.