Tip 5 Phone A Friend - Heated debates with heating repair man

I was hot and bothered because I had no heating. Central heating. Radiators. I've got hot flushes but the radiators are cold.

I don't like cold showers. I can put the hot water boiler on. But the main system which is on a timer is not working and no radiators react.

I've got the heating engineer back. The week before last he fixed the flue and he flew.

He was ill last week with 'man flu' he says. I don't want to know. I just want the heating fixed.

At a reasonable price. First I paid a plumber. He changed the pump and a triple valve.

The problem was not solved. But I paid him happily because he did another job. He plumbed in a shower head beside the hall toilet, like the ones you get in the Far East. (I brought the attachement back from the Far East. He recommends a central heating engineer.

The engineer fixed one problem, which I didn't know I had. But not the main problem. NO HEATING!

I told a friend, 'I've had the heating engineer'. My friend makes a pun on the word had: 'You had him, did you!'

I retorted with another pun, 'I had to make sure I wasn't had. I checked the bill.' Three meanings for the word had: actually short for an implied word - had a visiting, had a relationship, caught and had too big a bill - cheating you out of money. Isn't the English language funny.

Now, July 11, the man says he's changing the junction box. He is re-wiring it in. The 'relays'.

I had no idea whether I needed that. So, I got him to speak to my son who did electronic engineering at Brunel and my son agreed that he'd had problems with relays in equipment and whether or not it caused the problem the system needed changing if not updating. Let's hope it works.

Hurray - it works! The heating is on. Just like old times.