Wednesday, August 6, 2008
How to write positive profiles and emails? Be positive.
I receive a lot of emails to which I don't reply because it would take me half an hour just to send them simple rejections. I would rather spend half an hour sending a positive reply to the one man who sounds like he has qualities which appeal to me. But as a courtesy to those who have not received enough replies, here are some handy hints as to what might increase your response rate. Reading through profiles I see what attracts me. Bright and cheerful profiles and emails. From a confident person. Especially as women may expect the man to do the running. Confident image? This can be achieved by focus on your good qualities. Praise yourself or the other person. The man who knows where he is going will get a response. What might go wrong? Re-read your profile and email. Cut out all negatives, doubts, uncertainties. Consider these sentences: 1 'I don't know what to say ... ' (Conveys the impression that the writer can't make up their mind. A woman wants somebody who is a great email correspondent or good to chat to on the phone and courageous enough to invite her out. So leave out this sentence or change it to something positive.) 2 'I'm not ...' (Here's another negative. Would anybody write a job application listing all the things they are not? Would you approach a bank for a loan listing what you cannot do? ) (Think positively. You must have some good qualities.) 3 'List of reasons why our relationship might not work: a) You are too far away. b) My previous partner left me unexpectedly.' (On first reading the recipient might think you are being honest and interesting. They might rush to reassure you that the barrier of distance will be overcome. That if they commit, they won't suddenly disappear.) (But on second reading, on second thoughts, the recipient of a 'I'm not sure this will work' email might feel the whole thing of reassuring somebody else who is half-hearted is just too much hard work. No wonder the previous partner or lover ran off with somebody who was more fun. This writer is having doubts and we haven't yet answered their first email. How would you feel receiving an email about everything which went wrong before? Better to focus on what was good in previous relationships.) (All talk of previous partners is risky. 'I was abandoned' portrays you as a loser and as somebody who is pessimistic when what you want to convey is that you are worthwhile longterm.) Don't worry about your past emails. It's all a learning experience. Think of the greater success you will have in future and how much progress you have made. But from now on make sure you are always bright and enthusiastic. Somebody who would be fun to meet. I hope this helps. Good luck in your search.
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